Cooking is a survival skill and not some lowly job that nobody should do. There’s no pride is saying “I don’t know how to cook”. To bring in gender equality, men should pick up cooking than women stopping to do so. We are a progressive society, we must progress. It is regressive if both the people in a couple do not how to cook! How are you going to survive every single day?
In these covid times though it has become a distant thing to go to office and eat lunch in the cafeteria but still, imagine the sight of sharing and eating home made food with your colleagues. The joy is of a different level altogether. Same holds good for social get togethers as well. When friends/relatives come home, how would they relish on good cooked food if nobody cooks at home🙂. Ordering or getting food made by somebody else is not the same as cooking it and feeding it on your own. There’s so much of happiness hidden when compliments are received for that finger licking food. Or when your child goes out and says my mama/papa is the best cook in this world!
No it is not gender bias if Vidya’s mother asked her to learn cooking. It is injustice to the male child in the family, if he was not asked to learn cooking.
I have money to order/buy food/hire a cook
The perception of cooking has got so jinxed that people think it is some style statement to say, “I can’t cook but I have money to buy food”. Food apps, community kitchen, cooks and other facilities surely exist but there’s no substitute to home cooking and that too doing it on your own. How would you customize your cook’s cooking if you yourself don’t know how to cook? No you cannot call your mother every time, if that’s the thought.
As much as cooking is a survival skill so is, running the grocery order cycle, maintenance of kitchen, entire house in fact. All of these should become a part of essential learning, right from school. In today’s time, it is a necessity to share responsibilities.
Cherry Picking work: I will do laundry, you cook
Men can’t have an upper hand and cherry pick the chores they would like to do and then dump the rest on women. What gives them the freedom to choose and for which sin are the women supposed to accept the dumped work? These rights and divides are so deeply ingrained in our mind for generations that women have forgotten; they too have a right to choose or deny.
For several decades now, a housewife’s duties towards the house include cooking. Every single day, every single meal. Just as the husband goes to work every single day and foots every single bill. This olden day set up was working fine. In current times as well, between a working husband and home bound wife, I feel, these are fine. But even then cooking is a survival skill which men can’t choose to ignore. There are days when he might have to cook and support just as there are times when housewife might have to earn money and support.
Importance of Financial Independence
It is not cool to do “nothing” or be “just a housewife”. Men do not have such luxuries that they can choose to do “nothing” or be “just a homemaker”. Why do women think they can do so? If not anything atleast effort should be made to become financially literate. A large segment of women do not know how to execute banking transactions, let alone investments. Surprisingly even educated urban housewives are a part of this cohort.
In a country like ours, basic education is still a challenge so it may not be possible for everyone to do white collar jobs but there are many odd jobs and blue collared jobs available. Endeavour should be made to do something than just being at home.
Giving birth to a child and raising a child requires time and attention, no doubt. A child if not well raised with right moral values, is a future rogue of the society. But that is not a reason to never become financially independent. Moreover it is a shared responsibility between husband and wife to raise a child. Women can take a career break and be there for the child only till such time it is required. But I think, thereafter she has to come back to her independence levels. Apart from many other reasons, continuous financial dependency on men is many times the genesis of domestic violence and many other societal bias & crimes in our world. Therefore this thought has to be eliminated that it is a choice for women to work or not.
Husbands help wives in the kitchen
It is a misnomer to say husband helps the wife in kitchen, at a time when both the people are professionals and working. God didn’t pronounce a sermon during the birth of a girl that cooking is her responsibility. So it is not fair to assume that it is a woman’s job and the man is helping. It also does not call for huge appreciations if something is cooked by the man on some rare occasion, unless, you are doing these adulations for the woman as well.
Dignity of Labour
Running and maintaining a house is a big responsibility and should be taken up jointly. No work is small and nothing is below dignity. It is okay to clean toilets and child’s poop for both the genders. Just as it is okay for both to step out earn money and bring it home.
I know, the current generation of housewives are not going to overnight become entrepreneurs or get employed somewhere. But they can begin somewhere… may be just learn how to encash a cheque or do money transfer online. Same time I also know that overnight men will not pick up cooking however new parents can begin to teach their sons how to cook and not stop a daughter from learning how to cook in guile of making her independent. In the coming times these right behaviours will create hope for having a balanced society.
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